(no subject)

holy fuck.
how do you keep up with all the lies?
and furthermore, how do you sleep at night knowing people care(d) so much about you and your lies????


i'll admit, i had suspicion all along that ALL the tragedy could not be heaped upon one 23 year old, but i wanted to believe, especially since i had met you in person. i didn't want to be even more cyncial than i am although i admit to pulling away since your trip to toronto. don't know why that time but it seemed right.

i would say i'm embarrassed that i fell for it, but i'm not. i have an open, loving heart that YOU took advantage of. YOU should be embarrassed, not me.

you should be ashamed.
i hope you get help.

(no subject)

i may not have my timeline right, or all the details spot on, but i know the jist of it is true correct.

• her boyfriend dies in a car accident.


• she had to "hide", journal-wise, from another group of friends with whom she had a falling out. they all decided they would band together and leave her out in the cold. hmmm...wonder if she's done this act before...


• her father hits her mother.


• her mother, shortly thereafter, dies.


• she emails me with a 108, plus or minus, degree fever that she has for three days. incoherent emails that freak me out as they were designed to do. she passes out and is taken to the hospital in a big dramatic moment, is found passed out in a pool of blood reaching for her phone by her friend who had been out of town. and the only way we knew about it was from a post by this "friend" in her journal. and then a post by her brother. neither of whom were ljer's, yet they seemed to know their way around. there were other suspicious things about this but my memory sucks, as y'all know.


• she is diagnosed with MS. in and out of wheelchairs, crutches, etc.


• her father, from whom she is estranged, dies.


• she is beat up by muggers in the process of trying to help an old lady not get pursesnatched.


• she is stabbed in court.


• she is duped by her long-distance lesbian lover, finding out he is a man.


• and, i had never heard this from her, lung cancer.

all this and she's only 24. and with the exception of her boyfriend dying and her friends dropping her, all this in the past two years, tops.

SICK.